Relationship counselling by TickTalkTo

The Ins and Outs of Understanding Relationships

Love is one of the purest emotion, and marriage solemnizes love. Therefore, most people seek love as an expression of a marriage alliance. Being compatible with someone and spending your life is one of the most meaningful aspects of life. 

Besides, marriage gives you a sense of fulfilment and the feeling of being with a soul mate. However, there is another aspect of a marriage. Some marriages don’t work even if you give your 100% to them. 

And, there are many reasons why sincerely committed couples to lose spark with time. But, acquiring skills to make a connection last needs effort, and if you don’t make that effort – the prevalence of relationship troubles starts.

Some famous Bollywood couples like – Shahrukh Khan and Gauri, Ajay Devgan and Kajol, Akshay Kumar and Twinkle who have had a successful marriage run – All these stars have quoted that they made efforts and adjustments to make their marriage work.

A marriage can’t work if you don’t make adjustments and efforts. Every couple may go through a troubled phase in marriage – but how you deal with the phase is essential. In addition, a successful marriage depends on a lifelong commitment.

Common failure points for couples

  • Cheating or infidelity – Infidelity or cheating is a red flag in marriage. Unfortunately, most couples grow apart due to infidelity. 
  • Loss of love – Over time, there can be a loss of love. There is no particular reason – but couples fall out of love. 
  • Trust issues – If there are trust issues in marriage, the marriage won’t endure longer. 
  • Communication gap – Communication is the key to good marriage life. With no communication – there’ll be trouble for sure. 
  • High expectations – If you expect too much from your spouse – it can lead to troubles in your marriage. 
  • Financial issues – Most couples fight over economic issues, which often lead to trouble in paradise. 
  • The difference in priorities – If both the partners have different preferences, there is a problem understanding each other. 
  • Compatibility issues – Being compatible with your partner develops a strong bond. With compatibility issues – marriage won’t work for long. 
  • Relationship abuse – Relationship abuse is another red flag in marriage. With an abusive relationship, there may be troubles in marriage. 
  • Grown apart – Often, couples grow apart, and there can be no reason for it. Marriage won’t work if any one of the two grows apart.

Characteristics of a solid marriage

  1. Mutual respect – Respect is a foundation of marriage – without respect, the marriage won’t work for long. 
  2. Deep love – Love is a strong emotion, and it works more vital for marriage. When in love – your wedding will sustain you for a lifetime. 
  3. Honesty – If you are honest with your partner – there will be trust, and where there is trust – the love never fades. 
  4. Trust – If you nag a lot or have trust issues, it may develop a crack in your marriage. 
  5. Healthy sex – Healthy sex life ensures that you stay connected to your partner – it also develops an emotional connection. 
  6. Good communication – When you speak your heart out – there is no problem in understanding. Good communication leads to a better marriage. 
  7. Shared goals – If you and your partner have common goals – you can set your priorities together. 
  8. Fighting fair – Fighting fair illustrates an example of how you can put across your point without bruising your partner’s ego. 
  9. Forgiveness – Forgiveness is essential if you want to sustain a long-term commitment to marriage. 
  10. Validation – Validation or support should be constant. When you validate your feelings – it helps to develop trust in your marriage.

8 ways to make your relationship strong

  1. Keep realistic expectations: Keep realistic expectations from your partner as that won’t hurt you later in life.
  2. Communicate clearly: Communication is essential and clear communication is most important. Talk to your partner about every tiny detail of your life. 
  3. Genuinely listen and share life goals: Listen to what your partner has to say and share your life goals. A common perspective towards life matters the most. 
  4. Be fair: You need to be honest in understanding the situations – understand the viewpoint of your partner. 
  5. Plan date nights: Plan romantic date nights to reaffirm the love – A simple setup can also brighten up the whole mood. 
  6. Be dependable and affirming: Be responsible and affirming, and don’t ignore the feelings of your partner. It’s essential to go with the flow. 
  7. Keep the right balance: A proper balance of emotions can work wonders in marriage. Keep the balance and love your partner the way they are.
  8. Give each other space: Space is essential for understanding, trust, and respect. Without freedom, a relationship won’t thrive.

Is it a time to move on?

Moving on is not always ugly. For Example, Hrithik Roshan and Susan, Bill Gates and Melinda handled their divorce with dignity. Even after taking divorce – they chose to remain friends – setting an ideal example of a healthy relationship. Moving on is tough, but you can move on with mutual consent once you know the red flags.

Red flags you should know to move on;

  • No longer intimate: If you don’t initiate sex or are no longer intimate with your partner – you need to think about it.
  • No longer friends: Friendship is the most critical aspect of a successful marriage. If you don’t feel that connection anymore – it is a red flag for you. 
  • Your spouse stresses you: Is your spouse stressing you? You need to give it a thought. Marriage is about peace and not stress. 
  • You don’t communicate: If you hardly communicate with your partner – it is time to move on to the next direction.
  • There is no compromise: Compromise and adjustments are significant in marriage. However, if you are not ready to compromise, you need to talk to a marriage counselor.
  • You want different things from life: It is a red flag in marriage if you and your partner want different things from life and fight on petty issues. 
  • You don’t feel like yourself anymore: Look in the mirror – do you feel like yourself anymore? If not, it’s time you take a stand in your marriage.

How can therapy help?

Online marriage counseling and therapy are essential for couples who wish to seek advice on relationship issues. In fact, any couple going through marital problems can benefit from therapy. A therapist can help the couples work on parenting frustrations, infidelity, financial worries, emotional or substance abuse. 

Couples that suffer from the difficulties of marriage can talk to an online counselor or therapist who is impartial and committed to being active listeners to both the parties involved. In addition, therapists can act as an advocate for the health of your relationship.

In many cases, couples who had filed for divorce reconciled because of a successful marriage counseling session. When no one understands – a counselor can better understand your marriage woes. Nowadays, many apps can help you with online marriage counseling and relationship counseling. We highly recommend you to try TickTalkTo. We have the best therapists who have successfully helped tens of thousands of people, struggling with relationships, just like you.